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I would love feedback on a poster I am making for "Techbox" local tech repair business. There are 3 poster boxes on the outside walls of the business with heavy foot traffic so I'm periodically making posters to swap with whats in the boxes. The focus of this poster is on iPhone repair. The size will be 29"x46"

I have updated this poster since my last question I posted.

Does the poster have a clear message? Is the poster able to carry the story successfully? or is it too complex and should be simplified? Does this design have a good balance?

Here is the newest Poster Iteration Most Recent Design

Thanks,

-Ivan

  • 1 quick comment, it seems weird that #3 is pointing to his finger and not the phone directly unlike the first 2 numbers pointing directly to the phone. – AndrewH May 8 '15 at 17:26
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    You may want to review our critique guidelines and edit this question. As it currently stands, it's not a question users could provide objective answers to and, for that reason, may be placed on hold. – Scott May 8 '15 at 17:30
  • Sorry about that @Scott, Didn't realize. I will update my question. – Focused Muffin May 8 '15 at 17:36
  • Voted to close pending the update for a specific question. – Ryan May 8 '15 at 17:40
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    My primary comment (not worthy of an answer) would be that it's just odd to see #3 first. The poster reads pretty bad due to this. – Scott May 8 '15 at 18:07
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How do you first read this poster? how does it flow?

The first thing I found was that its awkward and had to search for #1 then #2 and so on. IF you're going to have a numbered list the design needs to be reconsidered so that they go in a sequential order from top to bottom. Not 1 on top right, 2 on bottom middle, and 3 back at the top.

Is the use of text redundant and unnecessary?

It is somewhat clear but not so clear I'd say the text is redundant.

What could be Added/Removed to give a more focused message?

Simplify the message. One statement somewhere in the middle area by what looks kind of like a cutting board. Maybe, "iPhone Repair" "Phone Repair" "Phone Restoration" "Screen Replacement" --- I don't know. But one bold tagline would be better for this design IMO than 3 unordered numbers.

Update

On your updated poster I think its a big improvement. I might remove a few scraps and enlarge the tagline though. Looks good though.

  • I agree with this. My eyes instantly went to #3. Searching for #1 and #2 were very counterintuitive and more work than they should have been, especially for something that's meant to quickly grab the eye of someone walking by. I also agree that you don't need that much copy. The artwork pretty much speaks for itself and illustrates the process of an iPhone getting repaired. One bold headline should be sufficient. – Manly May 8 '15 at 18:23
  • Hey Ryan, Thanks so much, I simplified the message and posted my updated design in the original question, with additional questions. – Focused Muffin May 11 '15 at 18:09
  • @IvanWitteborg updated my answer – Ryan May 11 '15 at 18:37
  • @Ryan What do you mean by "scraps" ? Thanks for the critiques it really helped a lot! – Focused Muffin May 11 '15 at 20:04
  • @IvanWitteborg the pieces in the middle on the cutboard looking thing. – Ryan May 11 '15 at 20:30
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It looks very good. Everyone can clearly understand the service without the 3 step explanation. The cracked iPhone could look more like a shattered glass plate, rather than a textured surface. I don't like the copy (and the order of 3,1,2) because it is unnecessary. The logo on the fixed iPhone is gauche. That large logo on the iPhone makes me subconsciously think that TechBox owns the "shiny new" phone ... I would therefore want to take my broken iPhone to the Apple 'mother-ship' instead.

  • Thanks for the feedback Dean, I agree the logo is too "in your face" Do you think this approach solves that problem? link Putting the logo on more discretely the wrist band – Focused Muffin May 8 '15 at 18:07
  • The logo could be on the anti-static mat (bottom left) ... then it will be centric and more noticeable. – Dean May 8 '15 at 19:29
  • @IvanWitteborg I think the logo on the wrist band works well. You can also put the logo on the bottom left as Dean has mentioned. – AndrewH May 8 '15 at 19:55
  • Thanks for those suggestions, I've made a few changes to the poster and simplified it. I added the new poster to the original question. Let me know what you think. – Focused Muffin May 11 '15 at 18:08
  • It looks great. The message is clear and interesting to follow. The client will probably hate their logo so small but you have the business name and service in the center of the page, as large as can be. If I was TechBox I would go to print and take you out to lunch. :-) – Dean May 11 '15 at 20:21
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I think that the logical, expected order of the three phones is not immediately apparent on first glance, and the explanatory text is necessary if you want to keep the current placement. Or you could move the shiny new phone down to the bottom to make for a more logical and easily recognized flow.

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